It feels like high school again imaging the jitters in my chest when the love of your high school life tells you... we can only be just friends.

This is the story of Theo, who was my closest friend, one year younger than me. He seemed so nice and his sister is also my friend. Through the normal course of time, he divulged his true intentions with me and shocked as I was, I didn't know how to say no.

I know now that I broke his heart, and I thought to myself, my parents strongly warns us about entering relationships until we finished school. I didn't want to frustrate them considering that I see their hardships putting us to decent schools.

Decades later, listening to this song, I remember him. I am not the most beautiful gal around campus but he made me feel like I'm the only woman in his eyes (cheesy!).

How hard could it be to be friends with someone you have loved? How could it be easy for someone who broke your heart to remain friends? Perhaps pride overwhelmingly engulfs that only we see is darkness, only thins we feel is pain.  Some sort of "if you don't need me, I don't need you too" kind of dialogue.

But friends you should be after the relationship, especially when you have kids together. And if divorced couples with kids could still be friends after the tsunami in their marriage, how can other failed relationships cannot end in friendship?

Perhaps they just moved on completely without them hanging to that dark past, the superlative of pain that we caused in them.  Well, the song below says friendship can be scattered by the wind, it just up for the storm to pick up the pieces again.

FRIENDS

You say you want to be friends
That's a newly sharpened blade
That's a dagger to the heart
Of the promises we made

That's a chapter full of pain
A season full of rain
A dark and stormy night
Spent all alone

Friends
Get scattered by the wind
Tossed upon the waves
Lost for years on end

Friends
Slowly drift apart
They give away their hearts
Maybe call you
Now and then
But you want to be
Just friends

You say you love me very much
And you'll always hold me dear
Those are the sweetest words
I never want to hear

What's a love without desire
A flame without a fire
Can't warm me late at night
When I need you most

Friends
Get scattered by the wind
Tossed upon the waves
Lost for years on end
Friends
Slowly drift apart
They give away their hearts
Maybe call you
Now and then
But you want to be
Just friends

Friends
Slowly drift apart
They give away their hearts
Maybe call you
Now and then
Darling can't you see
This is killing me
We could never be
Just friends

So exciting, SODEXO!

Christmas is nearing. In anticipation of the bonuses and gifts that I will be receiving, I also set aside funds for gift giving.  I have plenty of nephews, nieces and inaanaks (godchildren).

I recall the last time I received a gift check was also a Christmas gift that our company gave us. It was Sodexo, nothing else. It was fun because the amount was substantial, enough for Christmas grocery. I had a blast because it was also accepted as payment in one department store from where I live. That was one rewarding experience to be able to buy not just grocery, food but also apparel which I can use and each time remember that I received it through my good work.

I was really happy and I spent all of it. There is no expiration in the gift check because Sodexo GC’s have always been and forever will be valid, and that revalidation and replacement of Sodexo GC’s are free of charge once the validity date is reached.  However, I spent them all!

So this coming Christmas, it is a good idea to give as a gift Sodexo gift checks.  Please check out the link.

http://ph.benefits-rewards.sodexo.com/

My wish for this Christmas is to receive the same amount of gift check I received last year and I will treat my family with a feast at out favorite store, Jollibee.

It is true that not everything is in the price tag. I never really felt that gift giving is onerous. Anyway, the spirit of Christmas is love and we don't count the cost.  We just enjoy it.


"Price Tag"
(feat. B.o.B)

[Jessie J]
Okay, Coconut man, Moon Head and Pea
You ready?

Seems like everybody's got a price,
I wonder how they sleep at night
When the sale comes first
And the truth comes second.
Just stop for a minute and smile

Why is everybody so serious?
Acting so damn mysterious?
Got your shades on your eyes
And your heels so high
That you can't even have a good time

[Pre-chorus:]
Everybody look to their left (yeah)
Everybody look to their right
Can you feel that (yeah)
We're paying with love tonight?

[Chorus:]
It's not about the money, money, money
We don't need your money, money, money
We just wanna make the world dance,
Forget about the price tag
Ain't about the (uh) ch-ch-ching ch-ching
Ain't about the (yeah) bl-bling-bl-bling
Wanna make the world dance,
Forget about the price tag (OK)

[Jessie J]
We need to take it back in time,
When music made us all unite!
And it wasn't low blows and video hoes,
Am I the only one getting tired?

Why is everybody so obsessed?
Money can't buy us happiness
Can we all slow down and enjoy right now?
Guarantee we'll be feeling alright

[Pre-chorus:]
Everybody look to their left (to their left)
Everybody look to their right (to their right)
Can you feel that (yeah)
We're paying with love tonight?

[Chorus:]
It's not about the money, money, money
We don't need your money, money, money
We just wanna make the world dance,
Forget about the price tag
Ain't about the (uh) ch-ch-ching ch-ching
Ain't about the (yeah) bl-bling-bl-bling
Wanna make the world dance,
Forget about the price tag

[B.o.B]
Yeah, yeah
Well, keep the price tag
And take the cash back
Just give me six strings and a half stack
And you can, can keep the cars
Leave me the garage
And all I, yes, all I need
Are keys and guitars
And guess what? In 30 seconds
I'm leaving to Mars
Yeah, we leaping across
These undefeatable odds
It's like this, man
You can't put a price on a life
We do this for the love
So we fight and sacrifice
Every night
So we ain't gon' stumble and fall
Never
Waiting to see or send a sign of defeat
Uh uh
So we gonna keep everyone
Moving their feet
So bring back the beat
And then everyone sing
It's not about the money

[Chorus 2x]

[Jessie J ‒ Outro]
Yeah, yeah
Oh-oh
Forget about the price tag, yeah

I have a baby I love as my own. My life revolves around him. I find meaning in my life serving him, loving him.

He loves being around me and though at times it is hard to discipline him, he is so sweet most of the time. He showers me with kisses as he leaves for school.  He hugs me from the back whenever I bring something or buy him toys or other little things.

Those scenes pricks my heart with love. That's what we tell each other every night before going to bed.

I love you ma. I love you too anak (my child).

He is not mine and I let him know that I am his substitute mother because he has to know.  And I plan to let him go whenever he is ready and if he would ask me to. I told him I won't deny his freedom if he wants to go somewhere else.

He wants to be a pilot... and I know expenses for flying school is expensive. I will leave it to tomorrow and pray he changes his mind. If not, I will have to be prepared.

And I love him so... and to you my child,

You'll Always Be my Baby

There I was, ten years old
Waiting in my room for him to come home
I just knew he'd be so mad
Though I begged my mother not to, she told my dad

There was no denying I let him down
But instead of being angry
He put his arms around me and said

In the sunlight or the rain
Brightest nights or darkest days
I'll always feel the same way
Whatever road you may be on
No, you're never too far gone
My love is there wherever you may be
Just remember that you'll always be my baby

There I was, 21
Oh, I was so ashamed of what I'd done
On a country road parked one night
What started out so innocent, crossed the line

There was no denying, I let God down
But instead of being angry
He let His love surround me, and I heard

In the sunlight or the rain
Brightest nights or darkest days
I'll always feel the same way
Whatever road you may be on
No, you're never too far gone
My love is there wherever you may be
Just remember that you'll always be my baby
Yeah, yeah

There he is, my little man
I'm sure he'll get in trouble every now and then
And I pray to God that when he does
I'll be just as understanding as my father was

'Cause the last thing that I want to do is let him down
So instead of being angry
I'm gonna throw my arms around him, and I'll say

In the sunlight or the rain
Brightest nights or darkest days
I'll always feel the same way
Whatever road you may be on
No, you're never too far gone
My love is there wherever you may be
Just remember that you'll always be my baby
Be my baby

This is one favorite song recently because of its upbeat tempo.

Attending to so many seminars, this is always played as a Zumba song to awaken participants especially during unholy hours of 2PM til 4PM.

I like the song. I also try my best to keep up with its dance steps. They have simple steps but they still appear so complicated for me.

So here is my translation of the song. I hope you will find the translation well. If not, feel free to give your comments below. I would appreciate it.

Read on.



Dahil Sa Yo (Because of you)

Araw araw ikaw ang gusto kong kasama (Everyday I want to be with you)
Buhay ko'y kumpleto na tuwing nandidito ka (My life is complete everytime you are here)
Sa tabi ko o aking giliw di pa din ako makapaniwala (beside me, my dear, still I cannot believe)
Na ang dati kong pangarap ay katotohanan na (that my dream/hope is now a reality)

Ikaw ang tanging inspirasyon (You are my only inspiration)
At basta't nandito ka ako'y liligaya (and as long as you are here, I'll be happy)

Dahil sa'yo ako'y matapang (Because of you, I am brave)
Dahil sa'yo ako'y lalaban (Because of you I will fight)
Para sa'yo pagmamahal na walang katapusan (for you is my love that's never ending)
Dahil sa'yo merong pangarap (Because of you there is hope)
Pagmamahal ko sayo'y tapat (My love for you is true)
Para sa'yo pagmamahal na higit pa sa sapat (for my love for you is more that enough)

Gagawin ko ang lahat para lang sa'yo sinta (I will do everything for you my love)
At basta't nandito ka ako'y liligaya (And as long as you are here, I will be happy)

Minuminuto naghihintay ng tawag mo (Every minute I'm waiting for your call)
Marinig lang boses mo masaya't kuntento na ko (If I hear your voice, I'm happy and contented)
Wala nang iba pang hahanapin basta't ikaw ang aking kapiling
(I won't look for anyone else as long as you are with me)
Lahat magagawa dahil kasama ka (I can do everything because you are with me)

Ikaw ang tanging inspirasyon (You are my only inspiration)
At basta't nandito ka ako'y liligaya (and as long as you are here, I'll be happy)

Dahil sa'yo ako'y matapang (Because of you, I am brave)
Dahil sa'yo ako'y lalaban (Because of you I will fight)
Para sa'yo pagmamahal na walang katapusan (for you is my love that's never ending)
Dahil sa'yo merong pangarap (Because of you there is hope)
Pagmamahal ko sayo'y tapat (My love for you is true)
Para sa'yo pagmamahal na higit pa sa sapat (for my love for you is more that enough)

Gagawin ko ang lahat para lang sa'yo sinta (I will do everything for you my love)
At basta't nandito ka ako'y liligaya (And as long as you are here, I will be happy)

Ipinagdarasal ko ng sobra na sana'y tanggapin mo aking inaalay (I pray so hard that you will accept my offer)
Na pasasalamat sa pagliliwanag ng buhay kong ito (of thanks for enlightening my life)
Na dati rati'y di ganito na kay ligaya (which used to be not this happy)
Oh tanggapin ang regalo (Oh receive the gift)
Oh mga rosas at choco (Oh receive the roses and chocolates)
Liliwanag din ang buhay mo pag nilabas ko na ang puso ko (There will be brightness in your life when I bring out my heart)

Ikaw ang tanging inspirasyon (You are my inspiration)
Sa bawat araw na haharapin (to face everyday)
Gagawin ko ang lahat para lang sa'yo sinta (I will do everything for your my dear)
At basta't nandito ka ako'y liligaya… (and as long as you are here I will be happy)

Dahil sa'yo ako'y matapang (Because of you, I am brave)
Dahil sa'yo ako'y lalaban (Because of you I will fight)
Para sa'yo pagmamahal na walang katapusan (for you is my love that's never ending)
Dahil sa'yo merong pangarap (Because of you there is hope)
Pagmamahal ko sayo'y tapat (My love for you is true)
Para sa'yo pagmamahal na higit pa sa sapat (for my love for you is more that enough)

Gagawin ko ang lahat para lang sa'yo sinta (I will do everything for you my love)
At basta't nandito ka ako'y liligaya (And as long as you are here, I will be happy)

SECRETS TO A LONG LASTING RELATIONSHIP

Forever began the moment they said their "I do's".  It was 1972 and I watched their love grow through the years and the tide.

Love is foremost, learning to love yourself, as the famous line from a Whitney Houston song. My mother never ceased to improve herself as a public servant. My father improved his craft as a businessman. They are two busy people caught by cupid's arrow and 45 years later, they still love each other.

So what are the secrets to this long lasting relationship?

God is Love
My mom and dad's relationship is anchored in God's love.  They taught their children to give praise to God.  We go to mass every Sunday and pray the Rosary every night. We do that a lot.  It is true that God is love. Because of this, they are respectful to each other.

Partnership
My parents were busy in their respective careers. But that didn't prevent them from seeing their children grow normally as possible. Whenever one is away on a business trip, the other would stay behind to watch over us. At times when they cannot avoid being away together, they commission a relative or trusted neighbors to take care of us.

We are not well-to-do family but through their industry, they managed to pull us all through college.  Looking back, they tell us now how difficult their life was when four years in a row, their four children went to college. They were in great debt back then but their great partnership, cooperation and collaboration, we survived.  All their children now are good in their own respective careers and family life.

Generosity
If there is one thing that I am glad I learned from my parents, that would be their generosity. They are generous not only with money, but also with their talent and time. They give money in churches, help our neighbors or relatives in need. In fact, they sent four of my cousins through secondary school.

Despite earning their respective salary / profit, they share their money with each other. Their generosity in talents extend to their involvement in the community. My dad helps in fixing street lights in the barangay or any other way he could help. My mom, being a government employee, renders overtime work for free.

Orderliness
One such important value they have is putting things in order. They prioritize their affairs and activities. They taught us orderliness through cleaning our rooms, closets, the house in general, inside and out.

Our daily routine upon waking up is to fix our bed. We were made so independent that we took turns to perform chores such as marketing, cooking, dish washing, cleaning, laundry and others.  My sister and I, having been taught as women, we should know all the household chores, do the laundry. Laundry back then was so difficult, using mechanical pumping water, without washing machines and fabric conditioners.

These times that our parents are both aging, it is impossible to believe that my dad washes clothes for my mom. With the benefit of washing machines and water from the faucet, my dad could easily perform the task that my mom really hates to do.  Another thing that my mom loves so much in my dad is his use of Del Forever Joy and Love Fabric Conditioner.  Mom loves the scent of their clothes, which makes her hug my dad even more because Del Forever Joy and Love now has 15x longer lasting bangooooo vs a regular detergent brand based on consumer test in Metro Manila.

As her way of reciprocating dad's laundry, mom cooks their food, garnished with so much love as well.

This November marks the 45th year of their marriage.

Those are my parents' secret to their long lasting relationship.  And as I was listening to my music player, I heard this song...

From Here to Eternity

I did everything I could to get you here tonight
Without telling you why
Now girl if you only would please hold out your hand
And just close your eyes
I've been dying to ask you this one burning question
Will you be mine

From here to eternity
I'm asking you to share your life with me
Now and forever I guarantee
I'll always stay by your side
I promise my love to you
I'm willing and able and ready to
Whatever you need I am here for you
And I'll always be
From here to eternity

Well, I saved a year for this ring
I can't wait to see how it looks on your hand
I will give you everything that one woman needs
For a one woman man
I'll be strong, I'll be tender
A man of my word, and I will be yours

From here to eternity
I'm asking you to share your life with me
Now and forever I guarantee
I'll always stay by your side
I promise my love to you
I'm willing and able and ready to
Whatever you need I am here for you
And I'll always be
From here to eternity

She knows something is not right when everything around her is silent.  She just goes to a corner, ponders, cries, hates herself deep within.  She is the silent type, full of tears, when confronted with problems.  You cannot talk to her without her blaming herself.

This is me. That is the effect of being a victim of molestation as a child.

Growing up, it was hard to keep up with other girls my age.  I don't feel as normal as they are. And I cannot blame anybody. I told myself that I have to be strong.

And being strong is not easy when you know something is not right. Someone has to be blamed for what happened to me. Could it be my parents who weren't always around during my childhood? Could it be the guy who caused me pain? Could it be the marijuana that affected his system? Could it be me who was not able to distinguish between what is right or wrong?

I grew up not blaming anybody. I grew up struggling for my survival despite the darkness that has griped me. I am who I am today, and still wanting to be stronger each time. I always prepared myself for any problem that will come to me.

But I still cry every time this memory comes back. All I have to do it look at myself as an object in order not to feel self pity

Then I became so loving.  I love myself so much because I cannot expect anybody to love me and accept me as much as I accept myself.

Love is me....

THIS IS ME

Always been the kind of girl
That hid my face
So afraid to tell the world
What I've got to say

But I have this dream
Right inside of me
I'm gonna let it show
It's time to let you know
To let you know

This is real, this is me
I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be now
Gonna let the light shine on me

Now I've found who I am
There's no way to hold it in
No more hiding who I wanna be
This is me

Do you know what it's like
To feel so in the dark?
To dream about a life
Where you're the shining star

Even though it seems
Like it's too far away
I have to believe in myself
It's the only way

This is real, this is me
I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be now
Gonna let the light shine on me

Now I've found who I am
There's no way to hold it in
No more hiding who I wanna be
This is me

You're the voice I hear inside my head
The reason that I'm singing
I need to find you, I gotta find you

You're the missing piece I need
The song inside of me
I need to find you, I gotta find you

This is real, this is me
I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be now
Gonna let the light shine on me

There's no way to hold it in
No more hiding who I wanna be
This is me, this is me

Now I've found who I am
There's no way to hold it in
No more hiding who I wanna be
This is me

There is one thing that every peace-loving person desires in this life: that is world peace.  Villains in movies believe that peace is impossible, especially world peace where even couples can't find peace in their marriage.  Of course that is an overstatement.  Couple conflicts are inevitable. In fact, in healthy relationships, conflict is essential.

One day is a song by Bugoy Drilon, a local artist. The first time I heard the song, I thought it was foreign because I seldom hear a song almost reggae as this one. So happy to discover that its a Filipino artist who offered another interpretation of an Matisyahu piece.

The song struck me because of the martial law in Marawi due to the attacks of the Maute group, which is now considered a terror group in the Philippines.  The worst population affected there are the children.  They can no longer go to schools because of the wrath of continuous bombings which damaged public buildings, including schools and businesses.

It is really a desire for everyone, that
There will be no more wars
And our children will play
One day

Here is the rest of the lyrics:

ONE DAY - Bugoy Drilon

Sometimes I lay under the moon
And thank God I’m breathing
Then I pray, "Don’t take me soon"
‘Cause I am here for a reason

Sometimes in my tears I drown
But I never let it get me down
So when negativity surrounds
I know some day it’ll all turn around because…

All my life I’ve been waiting for
I’ve been praying for
For the people to say
That we don’t wanna fight no more
There will be no more wars
And our children will play
One day [x6]

It’s not about win or lose
Because we all lose
When they feed on the souls of the innocent
Blood-drenched pavement
Keep on moving though the waters stay raging

In this maze you can lose your way (your way)
It might drive you crazy but don’t let it faze you no way (no way)
Sometimes in my tears I drown (I drown)
But I never let it get me down (get me down)
So when negativity surrounds (surrounds)
I know some day it’ll all turn around because…

All my life I’ve been waiting for
I’ve been praying for
For the people to say
That we don’t wanna fight no more
There will be no more wars
And our children will play
One day [x6]

One day this all will change
Treat people the same
Stop with the violence
Down with the hate

One day we’ll all be free
And proud to be
Under the same sun
Singing songs of freedom like
One day [x2]

All my life I’ve been waiting for
I’ve been praying for
For the people to say
That we don’t wanna fight no more
There will be no more wars
And our children will play
One day